I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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