my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Randomize
