I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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