you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
