Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
