FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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