I look better un-naked...
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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