All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize