So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize
