YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, sorry about rent.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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