I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
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