you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
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