you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize