only if we run a train.
done.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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