After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
