i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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