Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize