Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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