That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
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