If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
We got so high we made milksteak
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize