I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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