You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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