just come out here and I will go home with you...
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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