Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
