Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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