belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
