): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
