Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
