Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.