why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
