i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
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his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
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And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
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