Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  We named our party play list daddy issues

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  (704): We named our party play list daddy issues http://tfl.nu/zy7m
  Replies (4) Good night (2659) Bad night (660)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.

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  (912): There is a distinct lack of front teeth here. http://tfl.nu/ak90
  Replies (25) Good night (746) Bad night (5851)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.

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  (402): Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat. http://tfl.nu/e56w
  Replies (19) Good night (905) Bad night (4779)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...

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  (630): note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots... http://tfl.nu/3sut
  Replies (14) Good night (4431) Bad night (1344)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out

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  (573): You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out http://tfl.nu/kgmu
  Replies (4) Good night (859) Bad night (2558)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed

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  (206): Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed http://tfl.nu/023t
  Replies (1) Good night (1809) Bad night (517)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.

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  (516): I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great. http://tfl.nu/3h0i
  Replies (14) Good night (2769) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.

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  (678): Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch. http://tfl.nu/rrk7
  Replies (7) Good night (2896) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."

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  (970): I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend." http://tfl.nu/7i0l
  Replies (9) Good night (610) Bad night (2655)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.

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  (816): I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me. http://tfl.nu/6mnq
  Replies (7) Good night (467) Bad night (928)
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  (760): View more from California

  Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver

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  (760): Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver http://tfl.nu/ovu0
  Replies (3) Good night (635) Bad night (677)
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  (925): View more from California

  A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.

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  (925): A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas. http://tfl.nu/wou7
  Replies (4) Good night (759) Bad night (317)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences

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  (610): Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences http://tfl.nu/5w4q
  Replies (1) Good night (501) Bad night (273)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  "Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?

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  (717): "Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right? http://tfl.nu/p6ak
  Replies (1) Good night (504) Bad night (190)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.

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  (336): We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette. http://tfl.nu/ba64
  Replies (7) Good night (275) Bad night (524)

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