If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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