Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
