he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Randomize
