So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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