yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
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