I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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