if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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