I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
