i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
