My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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