we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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