Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
