just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize