It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize