I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
