I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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