She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
