We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
