Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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