Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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